


Bomin cannot fall in love

by nieblasky



Category: Golden Child (Korea Band)
Genre: Bomin is the rich kid, Clueless Donghyun, Love Triangle, M/M, Protective Youngtaek, Unrequited Love, bomtaek, bonghyun?, strangers to rivals to friends to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:42:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23638528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nieblasky/pseuds/nieblasky
Summary: "What's the problem with a high school boy who wants to live a drama-like romance? Is it that hard to happen? I asked heaven and no one never answered me."OrBomin thinks he suffers from a unrequited love curse, wich prevents him from having his feelings reciprocated or reciprocate other person's feelings.
Relationships: Choi Bomin | TAG/Son Youngtaek
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Bomin cannot fall in love

When I discovered what love was, I was already too intoxicated with its perfume to protect myself from its sharp thorns.

A person's first love usually appears at school when they least expects it, or at least that is how it happens in romantic high school dramas. But, I entered high school already carrying a feeling strong enough to make me get up early and attend classes at a school, even though I had the option of being educated at home. When I saw myself in the mirror of my wardrobe, wearing a brown uniform and with a swollen face, I realized that love leads us to ignore our most severe aversions like waking up early, in my case. More than that, liking him made me take the crowded subway instead of using the services of my private driver, just to serve as his support at the train due to his short stature and weak arms. Seeing his annoyed face early in the morning was my fuel, as a vital part of a well-reinforced breakfast.

Kim Donghyun had me in the palm of his thin hands, even though he doesn't know it until today. Maybe the things didn't make much sense to him as it did to me, all those years since the elementary school where we met. He won a scholarship at a special arts school of all kinds, and I had good grades, theater skills and enough money to get a last-minute audition there too. At the time, I just wanted to keep a friend. But since we were kids, I think something inside me had grown like a bud of a very beautiful and somewhat cruel flower.

_Love._

My first kiss with him was right before the mid-year vacation, in my room amid video games and sweets.

"So? How do you feel?" I asked, feeling my heart wanting to jump out of my mouth.

"Normal? I'm just had my first kiss, I think"

He shrugged, a faint shade of pink adorned his thin face. I laughed when I noticed the violent redness of the tip of his ears.

"Just that?"

For some reason I expected something more from that simple pact between two teenage boys. For some reason, I wanted more than to had my first kiss, that annoying feeling of never being kissed that got teenagers with hormones in full bloom so alarmed. For some reason I wanted him to feel more.

I wanted him to feel the way I did after our kiss, light and innocent, kind of sticky with candy and that lasted for a mere half second.

I always got everything I wanted. No one never denied anything to me since I was born. Today I think that the perfect life that I had started to change at that very moment.

After all, love was a flower with many thorns.

Our second kiss was a few weeks later, torturous weeks of vacation I spent traveling with my parents abroad. I wasn't able to concentrate on anything more than the guilt I felt for have suggested that kiss. I was afraid that Donghyun would never want to talk to me again. I was afraid that he'd be disgusted of me. My mind created scenarios and possibilities and sometimes I even dreamed about it. My subconscious wanted to prepare myself for any possible outcome.

Bur life decided to give me a silly hope when I returned from the trip. Donghyun was standing in front of my door a few hours after I told him I had arrived. I was greeted by an awkward hug and, to my surprise, a light kiss on the lips.

This time, it lasted two seconds.

Our relationship had changed from a friendship to something a little more complex. He was very reluctant to give me all the affection I wanted, but I learned to be patient and enjoy all the little things that our new status provided me. I wanted everything to happen at the right time, but sometimes I couldn't help myself. It really hurt to have him to reject a hug or to see him run away from one of my kisses. I thought it was shyness for a while, but all the signs were on my face and I pretended not to see.

"I think I was wrong"

I just smiled, because I didn't know how to handle situations like that. I was not taught to be rejected, especially after I finally got what I wanted.

It was painful, but I was smiling.

Then, I found a way to try to live with the feelings that I didn't know how to deal with.

"Me too"

For the first time, I went against one of the things I was taught.

"Is it okay if we go back to just being friends?"

"Yes"

I lied.

I lied to Donghyun, who easily accepted my theatrical smile. Our friendship returned to normal in a few days. It was easy.

But then came the difficult part of all that: lying to myself. Accepting that I wouldn't have his feelings was not a challenge, I knew I had no choice. But living with my own feelings for him was a struggle. It hurted all day, everyday.

Just trying not to like him wasn't working. There is no manual or walkthrough to stop liking someone on the internet, not one that has worked, at least. So I tried to approach my problem with another tactic.

I started to accept love confessions from people who left notes in my shoe locker in the morning. I went to the back of the old school building and answered "yes", really hoping to be interested in that person who already had some kind of feelings for me.

Unfortunately, I never felt the same way.

I got tired of rejecting people after giving them hope. I felt terrible, even though most of them came after my looks, my family's money or my school status.

What was the point of having so many letters in my locker, if I couldn't return none of the authors feelings?

I was about to give up on getting over my first love and giving other people a chance when a signed letter fell on my feet one morning.

I usually received anonymous letters and it was always a surprise who I would meet behind the school, but this time I knew exactly who wanted to see me.

Bong Jaehyun was a childhood acquainted. He was the son of one of my father's friends, part of a rich and influential family like mine. We lost contact for a few years while we were still children. He was now in front of me, nervous, biting those full lips that he had since he was a child.

"Do you remember me?"

"Yes"

I accepted his invitation to a cafe in order to catch things up and I was almost surprised when, after a lot of talk, he declared his feelings to me.

It was strange to think that even after so long he had those feelings for me, but I didn't even notice his presence in that school until that moment.

"A friend gave me the courage to confess"

After a few seconds in a state of confusion, my mouth gave an abrupt "yes".

I thought it could work.

Jaehyun and I had a lot in common. I was sure he didn't like me for my money, he was rich too. I was sure it wasn't because of my popularity, he was also one of the school's sweethearts. To think it was because of my appearance also seemed bullshit, someone pretty like him could have anyone he wanted.

So I let myself go. His presence was pleasant and made me stop thinking about Donghyun. Jaehyun knew how to give me advice on things that few people could understand, accompanied me at my dad's boring parties and returned the affection that I didn't even know I was in so much need.

I thought I really could like him.

But, of course, that was a very poorly told lie, and like any great lie, there came the immense disaster that was the end of my "romantic" relationship and my friendship with perhaps the only person who really understood me.

His lips were softer than they looked. He held me by my face with shaking hands. I could feel his heart beating against mine.

It was just that.

When I opened my eyes, I saw his reddened face and watery eyes. I felt bare at the moment, not bare of my clothes, but bare of my character and my performance.

"I always wondered why you never kissed me," he said, smiling weakly as he slowly dropped his hands onto his lap. "It took me months to get the courage to kiss you first. This was my first kiss ever."

A pause.

He knew.

"I know why you never did it"

"I'm sorry" was all I managed to say.

"Me too. I'm sorry that my first kiss was with someone who never felt anything for me"

Before he left, I saw a tear falling from his face, a reminder that my lie has caused irreparable demages in someone's heart.

After that day, I ethically rejected all the people who continued to confess their feelings to me. I think it was some kind of punishment for me, to be reminded constantly that nothing was ever reciprocal with me, besides how much I wanted it to be.

"What's the problem with a high school boy who wants to live a drama-like romance? Is it that hard to happen? I asked heaven and no one never answered me."

It was after yet another polite rejection that I realized that maybe, my once perfect life was really trying to make it up to the years of perks and privileges I have had since childhood.

I was pushed against the brick wall as the boy I rejected was gone. I opened my eyes after the assault and faced the one who was holding me.

A boy named Son Youngtaek.

"You think this is funny, right? Playing with people's feelings?"

His eyes seemed to boil with disgust for me. No one ever, under any circumstances, raised a hand to me, but he was holding me against the wall in anger, with hatred.

"You rich, spoiled kids who think you can do whatever you want and nothing will ever happen. I'm disgusted."

He was a repeater, one grade above mine, two years older than me and owner of a dubious reputation, in addition to many piercings, broad shoulders and well-kept platinum hair.

And that up close, I could see even a little makeup adorning his eyes.

"You have no idea how much I had to hear Jaehyun talk about you. Ah, I had to put up with all the blah blah blah, Choi Bomin this and that. Everything for you to deceive him as the mean and despicable kid that you are"

Nobody ever talked like that to me. I've just been praised all my life. But despite that situation being new, I knew exactly how to react.

"You're right, I'm sorry"

I smiled, and Youngtsek frowned and pointed a fist at me.

"What are you smiling at? Do you think this is another one of your games?"

"I'm really sorry for Jaehyun. There's not a day I don't feel bad for hurting him. I was selfish and mean. I deserve you to punch me in the face"

He then looked at me as if I had grown a secound head and laughed so lawfully that it made me shiver inside. Not from fear, but from something different. Then he released me with a huff.

"You can only be kidding me. If I hit the school prince, they'll create a hate hashtag for me on Twitter, I'll be kicked out and I'll never get a job in my life."

He laughed again, and I could just smile.

"I'm sorry"

Youngtaek looked at me, confused, then he smirked.

"In the end, the school darling is just a big idiot"

"And aren't we all?"

His head tilted his head to the side, in deep contemplation of that question. The wind blew against his silver locks and swung his long earrings. His gaze was lost on something else far away from me.

"I guess so"

At that moment I was again throwing myself into the arms of another passion that wouldnt end in well. Because this time I't was not just unrequited love ...

It was a deep hatred.

The world decided that since I was born I would have only the best, loving parents, good education, everything I could buy with money, popularity, to be good in various things and a line of people in love with me.

But, the condition for all these things was the impossibility of loving and having my feelings returned.

At least that's what I said to myself when I found myself sighing one afternoon, when Youngtaek passed by my table in the cafeteria. Donghyun was more observant than he ever was, giving me a nudge and a suggestive smile.

"Is little Bominnie In love?"

"It's too early to say," I lied. I was getting good at that.

Don't get me wrong, I still liked Donghyun, but in a more restrained and conformed way. He was my old love, my first love and the owner of the first fragment of my broken heart.

And I wasn't even 18 yet.

"Isn't he dating that ... Bong Jaehyun?" My friend seemed hesitant to ask. I thought he was trying not to hurt me, as ironic as that sounded to me.

"No," I replied, based not only on the voices in my head, but also on my observations since the day Youngtaek almost beat me up. They just looked like good friends. Besides, I was the one dating Jaehyun until recently.

"I see" and the subject died there, to later revive in the form of a figurative punch not only in my face, but also in the face of my dear new object of affection.

Seeing my first love hand in hand with my ex boyfriend was not only weird, but kind of funny and disconcerting at the same time. The shy smiles and red cheeks were photographed in my brain as yet another reminder that I was fucking unlucky in love, sorry for the bad word.

But I was not the only one suffering.

Youngtaek watched the couple from a distance, hands in his pockets and chewing on the handle of a lollipop. What I saw in his eyes was something I knew very well.

Besides all the odds, we got close after that, since our best friends didn't have much time now that they were dating. As much as I wanted to be angry and tell them to get out of my face, I couldn't help but smile when I saw the two of them so happy. Jaehyun touched Donghyun's heart like I never could, and Donghyun made Jaehyun happy like I failed to do.

My feeling about it were bittersweet.

Youngtaek was different. He spent a few weeks discounting his frustration by shooting beer cans with his grandfather's pressure gun, cursing at everything and everyone he saw ahead (which was mostly me) and filling his belly with junk food. Apparently the poor guy always liked Jaehyun and it was the second time seeing him in someone else's hands, the first of them being me.

We were a pathetic duo.

At that time I accepted our condition as partners in the misfortune and didn't try to get him to notice my feelings. Which was good, we ended up becoming good friends and I got to know him better.

Youngtaek was not as mysterious as people gossiped about. He repeated the year because he studied in Japan for a while and came back at the end of the school year, not because he was a lazy ass troublemaker like they said. He danced modern ballet, played the star wars songs on the piano and was addicted to kpop, much to my surprise and joy. Sometimes we would lay down my bed just listening to my sad kpop ballad playlist, and when we were happy I would play that girl group playlist for us to dance together.

Things were going well, I even forgot that I had a growing passion for him.

Until the day I was reminded, as if a truck had hit me and launched me away.

It was mine ... One, two, three ... Fourth kiss.

They say that first kisses are unforgettable, in fact I will never forget mine. Nor the second, a reminder that everything is finite. The third one will never be erased from my mind either, as a picture of a huge mistake I made.

But ... Heck... My fourth kiss...

It was out of nowhere, we were sitting on the couch at my house watching kpop videos when Youngtaek looked at me with a unredable expression. I returned the dull expression, trying to understand what he wanted with that empty face. When I realized, I was breathing that delicious, woody cologne. I don't even know how long I stayed there, with my eyes closed letting him kiss me with hurry and curiosity. I just remember that my smarTV was playing Red Flavor and that I laughed right after the kiss because I accidentally bit his mouth and it turned just as red as Joy's hair at the mv.

"Sorry" I was still laughing.

"I shouldn't have done that ..." He looked a little nervous, and I got desperate. I couldn't stand be rejected again. That cycle had to end.

Or else I would finally give up.

"Do you regret it, hyung?"

Youngtaek looked at me with the corner of his eye and seemed to ponder. He was the type who spoke bluntly. He hated lies and beating around the bush. I expected a response right in my face. A loud...

"No"

I blinked.

Once, twice.

My mouth was open like a dead fish, and I must have looked like a fool to the boy in front of me.

My brain finally worked and I replied.

"Me neither"

Then he smiled. He was so handsome that I was breathless for a moment. Was it finally the time? Would I be free from that unriqueted love curse?

You know what?

Well, for now everything is fine here. I'm dating the ballet dancer who shoots cans when is angry and dances to lovelyz songs when he's happy.

Oh, and I finally got an F in the semester, because it seems that Choi Bomin's life cannot be perfect and have a boyfriend who loves me as much as I do love him at the same time.

But... I'm enjoying my life a lot more now, as imperfect as it is.

**Author's Note:**

> When I'm bored I tend to translate my fanfics to english to post here LOL I'm sorry if the writting is not that good :')
> 
> I'm here again with odd pairings bc someone has to to it anjshbgvdfcagvhbjnm
> 
> Hope you guys like it


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